The Norwegian public – that is, what happens in the liberalized media and its surroundings – is basically quite civilised.
Some might say boring.
We rarely hear people say things that don't seem to have been thoroughly discussed in HR department focus groups long before the statement is made.
Talk shows on television are researched and prepared to death, and the political exchanges, with a few embarrassing exceptions, are appropriately courteous and respectful.
And mathematical language, very rigid and flat, before it evaporates into thin air.
On stage: Tronder Haritas without any inhibitions. No, not Peter Northug (he is, after all, rather smartly dressed), but Ole Sæter, also known as the 'Lion from Singsaker' (an area usually distinguished by tactility and tone), and better known as fallen football power forward Rosenborg.
After Monday's win over Sandefjord, and after the goal that almost only Sæter could score, the protagonist has outdone himself. To put it very calculatedly.
To the usual question “What were you thinking when the shot went in?”, Sater answered so directly from the heart that even the mature cynic who signed the letter would be at home in the good chair.
This is what Sater said, after thinking about it for a second or a half:
“It was delicious. I don't remember much. I'll come home, mobile phone in my left hand, and your parents in my right hand. Then I'll enjoy myself. It'll be late tonight.”
He said what did you say?
Read again, if you dare. Although there's a good chance VG readers may have discovered it a long time ago.
Sæter's happy, but also slightly sad, answer to a confused TV 2 reporter became a TV moment (pillow) forever when it was broadcast.
Some may object to the introduction to this text. We really have a lot of very secret conversations in the Norwegian reality TV/influencer-infected audience. Don't forget on unedited platforms.
Yes, we do, and there is hardly a shortage of gender-related words and descriptions in such areas.
But that's just the way it is: only the most down-to-earth real people, so to speak, speak this way, the worst influencers, and that's within their own contexts. Even the humorists have not gone so far, in a solid, some say insulting, way, except for the lovely boys in the “Gauteshow.”
But with Ole Sæter, the mathematical sphere and the sphere of reality become one in a way that we have never seen at least this side of Peter Northug's less elegant, but by no means unfunny, one-liners.
As, for example, when Swedish commentator Jonas Carlsson exclaimed: “Northog is a wolf playing with his rivals, but here he is a pig,” to which Northog responded:
“I talked to his wife, and he must be a pig, too.”
But do we really want more pig talk in our national watchdog? Everyone is probably wondering about that. For good reason.
No, we don't want that. But in a long country where expressions of sexuality in certain regions are considered normal language, there is perhaps little to be surprising about a footballer resorting to trivial metaphors in a moment of triumph.
But when even this writer, a hard-line Tronder and principled liberal, felt a flash of shame at Seiter's frank description of the coming ritual of victory, it must mean that we had almost witnessed something transcending culture when the sentence dropped.
Read also: Satter was reprimanded by the captain after his indecent behavior on the live broadcast
Even the TV 2 reporter, always chasing quotes, realized that a line had been crossed, and denounced Sæter's behavior by reminding him that children also watched the channel's football broadcasts.
A strange paradox arose: the TV 2 man, who of course knew that Sæter was by far the weakest canon in Norway in sports, was almost overtaken by Sæter who had over-satisfied the demand for people's erotic ointments.
(TV 2: “Say something about it, Ollie.”)
Ollie: “Hold my beer.”)
One of the funniest episodes on the legendary series “Seinfeld” revolved around Sutter's favorite party ritual, although the activity was never mentioned by name. Known from the Bible. “Competition”as the episode is called, is an iconic demonstration of the “show, don't tell” storytelling motto.
On the other hand, Uli Satter certainly does not master the art of suggestion, and we can go beyond that, declaring the decadence of time, the zero point of culture, and the ordinary.
But there were many of us who laughed. Who is still laughing, albeit a little embarrassed.
Lerkendal's HR department, on the other hand, might be somewhat less inclined to the lion's grim antics.
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